Here we are once again in the land of real-life Sweet Valley. Today, we open with Elizabeth reading aloud from a book called "The Beginners Guide to the Rules of Football". She sighs and closes the book and complains about why it makes no sense to her.
Jessica: That's because it doesn't make any sense. Why are you reading about baseball?
Jessica: *rolls eyes* Like there's a difference.
Elizabeth is reading this book because Kyle (who?) quit the Oracle, so Elizabeth is having to cover the upcoming Homecoming game. Since Jessica is a cheerleader, Liz hopes that she knows something about football.
Jessica: All I know is, when the players jump up and down, we jump up and down.
Elizabeth: Just start with the basics. What's the point of the game?
Jessica: Wait! I know this one. Football is like, when you're at the mall and you see this killer dress, but it's only in one size. Then you see this girl scoping out your dress, but you think there's possibly no way that she could look as good as you do in it. So you find someone else to run the interference. If you grab the dress and make it to the cashier, it's like a touchdown!
The doorbell rings, interrupting her description. It's Lila. Fowler Manor is getting fumigated, so Lila will be staying with the Wakefields (I'd thought she'd stay at some rinky dink hotel). She's come over early because she can't stand the thought of all the creepies in her house. And she means the exterminators not the bugs. Mr Fowler is in Hawaii on business, as usual. The twins welcome Lila inside, and has brought along a mountain of suitcases with her.
At Moon Beach, Enid is complaining to Liz about how she met this guy who made her feel tingly all over, but she hasn't heard from him in over 6 months. Liz points out to us, that Enid is actually talking about her dentist, but Enid claims they really connected! Poor single Enid. She has to put up with Elizabeth lectures, such as how being single is a good thing. It's nice to feel independent! Todd is at another booth at the cafe and just... stares as Liz leaves. It's kind of creepy. He then stares at a group of jocks who also leave.
Enid goes and sits with him to talk about... himself. Todd thinks he's a total loser because he was cut from the Vermont team and had to come back to Sweet Valley. Enid tries giving him a pep talk about how she TOTALLY understands because up until a few years ago, she used to do ballet, and it was her LIFE (since when?). One day, her teacher told her she wasn't good enough to be in the class anymore, and she should take up origami instead. She got through it by *~*~**believing in herself*~*~*~. Her little speech brightens Todd up and he tells Enid she's really cool for understanding him. He leaves, and you can see the crush starting to form in Enid's mind.
In Jessica's bedroom, Lila is organising her clothes in the wardrobe. Jessica pulls out a fold up bed and pats down, commenting that she hopes it will be comfortable.
Lila: That is so generous of you Jess, giving me your bed.
Lila: You're the best friend ever!
Heehee. Pwnd, Jess.
Jessica admires Lila's wardrobe, but Lila doesn't see the big deal because she left most of her clothes at home. She then comments about Jessica's life is so much better in her cosy little house, with a sister right next door. Jessica offers her to swap Elizabeth for Lila's trustfund.
My tape goes terribly fuzzy and I can just make out Jessica trying to borrow Lila's clothes. It the switches to Liz and Enid, and Liz is bitching about Todd, and how she and he are TOTALLY over. It's time we both moved on with our lives.
Enid hits up Manny at Moon Beach to ask his advice about what her "friend" should do about liking a guy that she thinks just sees her as a friend. Manny is super excited, because he thinks Enid is talking about them and that Enid's "friend's guy" probably hasn't said anything because he's just shy.
There's a pile of random clothing on the Wakefield's couch that Lila bought for the twins to thank them for letting her stay. She feels very charitable in giving away her things, comparing herself to Mother Theresa. The voice of reason Elizabeth says Lila doesn't owe themanything for being able to stay, though Jessica disagrees since she's sleepign on a "mouldy, old cot". Lila asks if she can stay a few more days while her house is being painted.
Liz: I thought your house was being fumigated.
Lila: ...oh... it is. After they finish painting.
I smell a lieeeeeeeeeeee.
Todd's putting books away in his locker and Enid creeps up beside him and compliments his shirt. Which is just the SVH gym uniform. Todd admits he's been feeling too emo lately, and that Enid's talk really helped him feel better, so he's going to try out for the team again. Enid suggests they go out and celebrate tonight, at some new place she knows at the mall. Todd accepts.
Conveniently across from where Enid stands, Manny leaves a classroom. In her state of bliss, Enid rushes up to him and kisses his cheek and gives him a hug, ready to share her good news about her OMG DATE WITH MY BFFs EX-BF!!!!! but she spots Liz coming up the hallway and hurries off, leaving Manny standing there all omgwtfenidluffsme.
The timing in this show often confuses me. First we were at school, now we're all of a sudden at the mall where Jessica is complaing about not being able afford to buy anything. Lila wanders around, and Jessica then spies her stuff a scarf into her bag. She confronts Lila, but Lila says it's ok. She's spends truckloads of money at the store as it is! And it's not like she's going to caught. I'm way too good at it. Oh, Lila.
Jessica is still horrified. WHAT WOULD MR FOWLER SAY. Lila tells Jess that she knows Jessica would love to steal something, but she's just too scared. She points out a belt that would suit Jessica and Jessica looks at it and thinks. Then we cut a shot of jessica wearing the belt around her waist, so I guessshe did steal it. BAD JESSICA. The two girls sqeual in Jess' room about how scary but fun it is to steal. Elizabeth walks into the room and asks where they got all of the stuff. THEY STOLE MORE?! Liz has no real interest in all of the stuff and opts to watch ESPN instead. Lila and Jess plan on going back to the store tomorrow to "really make a killing".
Instead of watching ESPN, Liz is actually playing pool at Moon Beach with Enid. She asks if Enid wants to go see a movie with her tonight. Enid hesitates and fidgets around before admitting that she has a date with Todd.
Enid: Wilkins. You know; tall, blonde, used to be captain of the basketball team.
Liz: You mean my ex-boyfriend?!
Enid: You said you didn't care if he went out with someone else!
Liz: I didnt say it was you!
Wtf Todd is not blonde.
Oh, and Liz is upset and just left Enid in the middle of their game.
Later on that night, Enid and Todd are walking around after finishing their meal. It was an expensive meal and Todd comments he would have dressed a lot nicer had he known. He's talking about telling a person how you really feel and blah blah and Enid is all :D :D :D thinking he's talking about her. She grabs him and gives him a kiss, and Todd's head almost pops off with WTF. He realsies Enid has a crush on him and he apologises and admits to still having the hotties for Liz.
Jessica and Lila hit the store again and walk along the racks of clothes just grabbing stuff randomly and putting in their handbags. They also look around shiftily while they do it. Not very inconspicuous, girls. They're about to leave when a security guard grabs them both. BUSTED.
Lila: I'M NOT GOING TO BE HARASSED BY SOME BRAINDEAD FASHION-FAILURE.
The girls get dragged into a back office, where one of the staff members goes through their bags, pulling out the stolen merchandise. The employee threatens to call both parents and Jessica begs him not to. Not that they can anyway. Parents don't exist on this show!
Lila tells Jess not to worry, they only need to keep their story straight.
Jessica: She made me do it! I'd never done it before, ever!
Lila is upset over Jessica's outburts and angrily gives her father's number to the employee declaring that he's probably too busy with his new girlfriend to care. The employee leaves to make a call and the securty guard stands watch in front of the door. Jessica starts talking to Lila, asking about her dad being in Hawaii on business. lila admits that he's not, and he's actually at home with his girlfriend Monique, who prances around like she owns the place. She's barely older than me. You dirty old man, Mr Fowler!
The girls sit on some boxes and have a heart to heart about how Jessica should have listened to Lila, and that she will from now on. At least until the next episode. The employee comes back to see the girls hug, and tells them he's glad they've worked out their issues, because they're going to have to spend a lot of their time together. Oooher.
Elizabeth is moping infront of a romantic movie when Enid knocks on the door. She answers but starts to close it when she sees it's Enid. Enid is quicker and drags her outside, admitting thather date with Todd didn't end up being a date and that she made such a fool out of herself, because all Todd talked about was Liz. The girls make up and Elizabeth vows that Enid will find herself a boyfriend.
A door opens in a room called Miss Kitty's Korner. That's Korner spelt with a K. Get it?! A weird lady is inside singing "ta tay te toe too". Lila and Jessica warily walk in wearing a maid-like uniform. The weird lady greets them, calling them "helperinas". Oookay. The lady introduces herself as Miss Kitty.
Lila: I'm Lila Fowler.
Jessica: And I'm outta here.
Miss Kitty: Would you ladies care for a snack? I've got raisins! FUN SIZE!
Miss Kitty's is a children's crèche, with many activities. Snacky time. Story time. Puppety time. Sleepy time. Get ready for a funderful day! Miss Kitty leaves the girls, saying she's late for her therapist. Oh, my. Lila thinks the kids will be easy to look after. All they need to do is read them a story, feed them some snacks and put them to bed!
Oh how she was wrong.
Suddenly it's night time again, and Manny is ringing Enid's doorbell. She answers in her PJs.
Manny: I was just on my way home from school.
Enid: But you live across town.
Manny: I knew this neighbourhood didn't look familiar.
Enid: And school got out 6 hours ago?
Manny: I'm a slow walker!
He's brought her.... some food. I have no idea what it is apart from it having strawberry filling, which is Enid's favourite. Manny grabs Enid into a hug, and the show ends on Enid's face all O_O