September 26th, 2009

the rushies

SVJH #17: Whatever

Yay, my very first SVJH book! It feels so different actually sitting down and attempting to recap a book. (Even one as thin as the SVJH books.) The TV episode recaps feel a bit like cheating. It's kinda like renting some Daniel Day-Lewis instead of reading The Crucible. Or Robert Redford instead of The Great Gatsby. Or Leo instead of Romeo and Juliet. Or Gwyneth Paltrow instead of Great Expectations. (That one? Not so helpful. I can't believe I passed anything in high school.)

I'm the first to admit that when I was growing up, these SVHJ books were my bible. Since I'm relatively young compared to some of the folk who grace this community (I'm turning two whole decades old in a month, let's hear it for me!), I had the pleasure of reading all the Sweet Valley serieses at the same time. Wait, pleasure's not really the right word for it. The setup actually confused the hell out of me. I mean, why the hell do we need a series of the Wakefields in middle school and another depicting their time at junior high? Especially if it's not even going to have Bruce or Lila in it? (And don't even get me started on the devastation I felt the day I realised that Bruce and Lila were only together in college. *Sobs* I'm sorry. I'll pull myself together for the sake of the recap.)

This week I'm presenting you with an inside view of SVJH #17, which bears the fabulously lame nineties title of Whatever. Not my favourite SVJH book, but the only one I have that hasn't been recapped yet. That's Lacey, or Lila Zero, as you Coca-Cola fans may know her as. She's an attitude-y brunette, as is evidenced by the fact that she's doing the 'whatever' sign while wearing a thumb ring. Wow, what a 'tude! I can feel her burning teen angst from here! (Don't worry; there's a cream for that.) Note: I totally had a top like that when I was growing up. A little trip to the title page tells me that this book was actually released in May 2000, but I can't very well make fun of the decade we're in, now can I? I'll assume it took more than five months to write. Ha, I'm sorry, not even I could keep a straight face saying that. Let's just get into this bitch, shall we?


Thanks to eBay for the crappy cover picture. You can still see the thumb ring, though, so I guess that's the main thing.


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#56 Lost At Sea

I don't know how long ago this was recapped, and in fact I've just read another SVH book that felt far more snark-worthy. But everytime I saw that soggy face staring back at me I felt pulled towards this book. It might be Elizabeth, as that’s who the caption refers to – but there is mention of Jess having a gauzy coverup. Either way, the caption asks will Elizabeth ever see Jessica again? I mean…clearly. Who are we kidding.

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